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4:49 p.m. - Sunday, Feb. 02, 2003 this morning i went to bed at 4 or so after working on the picture to put on my design page of me. then at 8-8:30 my mom yells up my stairs "KARA GET DOWN HERE NOW!" and i was like oh shit, what the fuck did i do. i was really concerned because i did my dishes, and cleaned up after my self. she called all of us (my brother and cousin) out to the porch. im in shorts and a tank top... its cold. and she starts reeming us for leaving a mess. i ate an entire large pizza yesturday, so i had a pizza box, plus audra's, and mom told me to break em down and throw them away. i folded them and put them in the trash. but i was supposed to tear them apart. that was never specified. my mom yelled at joey and deonna for not eating their food. they will take a lot of food and cover it in hot sauce, this is mainly deonna, and not like the way it taste and throw it away. or get cereal. yeah this is mostly deonna, not joey. she disgusts me to an extent. but she wasn't raised like i was so i have to take that into account. but yeah my mom was pissed, has been pissed because since deonna has been here the grocery bill has skyrocketed, and the phone bill, holy shit. if i was mom i would make her pay for it through slave labor or something. but yeah, when we were out there mom brought up the fact i was eating pizza when she was cooking dinner. i didnt think i was offending her, hell i didn't even need to be home right then. that was like 5-5:30 and my curfew last night was 10:30. so i was home early. i actually came home to get the video camera so audra, sarah, and i could film our adventures and misadventures. haha. we planned on going iceskating without skates... and other things that seemed funny then but i can't remember. but! we are going golfing! we are going in golfing outfits too, the hats with pom poms, capris, socks like the ones i have on. yeah its going to rule. but anyway! my mom asked me how i would have felt if i were her and i was eating pizza when she was cooking. i said i wouldn't particulary care. and she said "you wouldn't" and then when joey and deonna were allowed to go about their business, she asked me to stay on the porch. (im still in shorts and a tank top, and shaking and bouncing up and down to try to keep warm...) she said something about my not caring comment and how if i was intelligent i wouldn't have said that. so i was like "i don't exactly appreciate being called heartless and ignorant" and she said "i didn't call you ignorant but some of the comments you have been making lately justify the heartless thing" she said i was heartless! what the fuck. if i was heartless i wouldn't be crying right now, i wouldn't have been starting to cry them. i started to cry because my mother called me heartless. my friend cuts himself and i cry for an hour in front of her just last weekend, but im heartless because of some comments that i have made. over what!? when she yells at me its because my chores aren't done, and i justify them, take up for myself. i used to just tell her what she wants to hear, but i'm "SEVENTEEN, ACT LIKE IT" (my mother this morning). so i have been. i have a fucking brain, and she doesn't exactly care for my opinions. especially about the military... hahha. yeah. my moms in it, im against it. but anyway. yeah. i'm heartless. so all those tears were more of my bodies way of getting rid of excess water or something because they didn't serve any purpose. on a happier note, i've made new friends... yeah, like ryan, he's incredibly attractive, haha. yeah. i'm hoping to have a lot to say about him later. -=shrugs=- and random kids from shows. oh! and i was so badass i was on the guestlist for unearth. shadowsfall is horrible. horrible i say! but eh, i got kicked in the stomach so it was so worth it. but yeah. there a "brief" entry.
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